real deep love problem...

[supa dupa ninja]

I know this guy from school who is falling for this girl.
this friend of mine is a devouted christian. seem's like a simple "boy meets girl" kind of thing, eh?
but the problem starts, with this girl, lets call her ms. x. ms. x is a real nice girl a "girl next door". yet she's no ordinary girl but infact... a satanist.
what should the guy do? is this forbidden love or far more worse?
tell me please of your opinions.

[Destroyer2000]

I wouldn't want to go out with her as she is...he may have fallen for her, but maybe he just needs to be friends and try to make her a Christian before he gets any ideas about love.

[Destroyer2000]

I forgot to add, that feelings of love can be very hard to resist, but I don't believe in 'love at first sight'. He's most likely just infatuated.

[Fsiphskilm]

She might be going through

[Azier the Swordsman]

Not a good idea. The bible says not to be yoked with unbelievers. God didn't just make that up either, he had good reasoning. Play with fire and you will get burned.

[Shinja]

yeah i cant see being yoked any worse that to be with a satanist.

[cbwing0]

I must agree with those who take the "do not be yoked with an unbeliever" stance. However, it would be helpful to know whether it is just him falling for her, or if the feelings are mutual. If she also likes him, then she might be more receptive to the gospel. I might suggest that they get to know each other better, and that your friend make an attempt (or more than one) to lead her to Christ before the actually start dating. If it comes down to it, he could give her an ultimatum: become a Christian, or the relationship can't work and it should end. That may be a bit harsh, but this is a serious and unusual situation.

[Mr. Rogers]

if he goes out with that girl, he's askin for big trouble. a christian should not go out w/ a satanist.

[mechana2015]

WARNING WARNING WARNING

I was in a relationship with a "nice" girl once and thought it was great! Found out she was *ahem* not as moral as I thought. Broke up, hard lesson learned. It's a very bad idea to go out with someone that you arn't sure about. In my case she was pretty, and a cheerleader, but had major issues with attitude and hatred as well as a family that well... wasn't all that nice. (Lying was very easy for them...something they tried to make me do.)
That match is a match made in hell. My experience wasn't even satanic and it was horrible for my life and feelings and walk with God, so imagine the damage done by someone blatently anti-God and anti christian.

[CobaltAngel]

If he really truly loves her than he should think about what's best for her. Perhaps he could just be her friend and try to give God's message to her. IMPORTANT - if he does do this he should stay close to his christian friends. We all need backup sometimes. ^_~

[supa dupa ninja]

I think the girl like's my freind too. if the people here were wondering...

[Psycho Ann]

Let's just say it's easier pulling someone down from a chair rather than pulling them up on one.

Experience from my parents divorce, I'm pretty much with the general "it's better not to go for it".

[shooraijin]

> Let's just say it's easier pulling someone down from a chair rather than pulling them up on one.

That's probably the most succinct way of putting it I've ever heard.

[Gypsy]

Let's just say it's easier pulling someone down from a chair rather than pulling them up on one.

Too true, too true.

[Michael]

I say quit dating all together. But that's my opinion.

[Fsiphskilm]

Well yes I see what you're saying and

[Retten]

Here is my quick advice!
"Do not be deceived: Bad Company corrupts good morals" 1 Corinthians 15:33
So unless you can definitely help this girl out I would stay away!

[Fsiphskilm]

I see what you're saying...

[Shinja]

well theres a differance between being friends and being a couple. some times you just have to let people go.

[EireWolf]

Let me get this straight... your friend is a Christian... and he wants to go out with a Satanist??! I don't care how "nice" she is or how attractive... As a Satanist she stands against everything a Christian believes in. Does your friend truly love God? Is he truly loyal to Him? To go out with this girl would be to break that loyalty and cast aside that love.

If you haven't noticed, I feel VERY strongly about this. Never date a person you would never consider marrying... and I don't know why a Christian would even think twice about marrying a Satanist. And "missionary dating" is never a good idea.

I'm not saying he shouldn't be her friend... but dating her is a whole different issue.

[supa dupa ninja]

Let me get this straight... your friend is a Christian... and he wants to go out with a Satanist??! I don't care how "nice" she is or how attractive...

"nice" as in good neighborly type of girl, that you don't really notice(at first glance) that she believe's in our lord's enemy. she's the type of girl that live next door to you. she's not even very beautyful. it's her personality that he like's not what she looks like.

[madphilb]

Sounds like a paradox, but then again. Find something in life that ISN'T a paradox? Unless there's another explanation that I'm not aware of right now. I'd say that's what makes the Bible Perfectly true.

Most of those sorts of things are kinda like bookends on life to hold us in ballance (God's very well balanced).

Take money... you'll find in the Christian culture everything from the, well, "Name it and Claim it" crowd (for lack of a better term) which holds onto scriptures that talk about God providing, etc.... then on the other end are those who feel they're not holy unless they're living in the worst sort of poverty (and back it with scripture).... The truth, God's Truth, lies somewhere between.

This can be found all over the Bible (usually you'll find more verses to counteract things that come easy to us as fallen people which is why there seem to be more verses about the evils of money than not, keeping with our example here).

In this situation (or similar ones) as listed in this thread... one half shows the importance of not allowing us to get dragged down by the company we keep... or specifically getting "unequally yoked." At the same time there are the other examples/verses that show that we're not to follow Marg Simpson's advice to her son Bart when she tells him "Nelson is a sad, troubled little boy and he needs to be seperated from everyone else." (or something like that).

[shooraijin]

> I see what you're saying.... But also Jesus hung out with the wrong crowd too. He hung out with the sinners and ate at their homes.

Think clearly here. Is that the same thing as *dating* them?

Missionary dating can't work anyway even if it *were* a good idea, because the whole point of marriage is *one* person, and you can't offer that level of intimacy to more than *one* person. Plus, it's *not* a good idea. How practical is it to offer yourself in love to someone who doesn't share your core beliefs? We always talk disapprovingly about people who got married who have "nothing in common" -- how can this be any different? Furthermore, it's openly manipulative if you're doing it only to spread truth (imagine if some girl did that to you) rather than be joined to someone else, and if you were actually serious, it means that you're now chained to a doomed relationship because at least one of you doesn't have Christ in mind with your eventual marriage.

Bluntly, there is no way a house divided against itself can stand.

[EireWolf]

Well said, shooraijin.

[Fsiphskilm]

[quote="shooraijin"]Think

[shooraijin]

> Depends on what you consider dating... Hanging out with her/him and talking, listening, finding out what you agree / disagree on... Hanging out with freinds isn't really that different.

But it *is* different. Are you going to have the same kind of relationship with your friends that you intend to possibly have with the person you're going to date? Just because you may do some of the same sorts of things does not mean that the goal is the same, too.

[Mave]

Based on personal experience, things are hard enough between Christian denomination (Catholic/Protestant relationship didn't work out). Both individuals believe strongly in their faiths and church doctrines.

One reason I see such 'odd' matchings work is because someone in the relationship (or both) are somewhat lukewarm. I'm assuming that you hope your friend to be spiritually on fire and fiercely loyal to his faith.

I like what PsychoAnn said. You should have crystal clear signs that God desires you to pursue such a relationship (which requires a lot of grace and spiritual strength in order not to go down). I've seen many ppl who became too proud and thought they'll never fall in such a relationship. Many did. Using "spreading the gospel" as an excuse to date someone is unacceptable, IMO.

Did your friend pray and consult God about it?

[supa dupa ninja]

I don't see him very often, but as freind I know his faithful to the lord.

[Twilly Spree]

How old is this girl? How set is she in her satanic ways? I had friends in high school that were all about being a vegetarian, but they grew out of it. It may be just a phase. Also maybe this is God's way of calling him to help her. Maybe they shouldn't start a relationship right away but he can give it a try. Sometimes I think that dealing with someone who is not of your faith can only come to strengthen his own. Who knows really, maybe she can attend mass with him or something or a youth group. Maybe she just says she a satanist but really isn't at all. Maybe she's just confused and needs a little guidance.

I guess I didn't really answer it. I'm just upset that people are writing her off without knowledge of what she is really like or what she has been through.

[ShiroiHikari]

o_O This topic brings back memories.

Sit down and grab your snack/drink of choice, cuz it's storytime.

It's approximately March 2003. My boyfriend and I are fighting a lot, and finally, I break it off with him. I had a pretty close online friend at the time (who shall remain anonymous) who was "counseling" me through this whole ordeal. Since he was so comforting and really seemed to care what was going on, I kinda started to get attached to him. I mean, he was smart, funny, and listened to me. All good qualities, right?

Well, he's a polytheist. Believes in gods and goddesses. (He calls himself pagan, but I'm not sure if that's the right term or not.) And I knew that. But I still longed for a relationship with him, because he was just so smart, and funny, and listened to me, and seemed to respect me. The part that's even sadder was there was a mild nagging attraction to him even before I broke up with my boyfriend.

Anyway, he said he liked me too, but that he'd have to think about it, because he was still cautious after his last breakup. So after a while he told me he didn't want a relationship because we were of such differing faiths, not to mention the distance. Of course, my foolish little heart was crushed, because I was blinded, I guess.

After being bitter and sulky for a while, I started talking to my boyfriend again, and we patched things up and have been happy ever since. I know it sounds like I just said "Well, since I can't have him, I guess I'll just take you back." Trust me, it's not the case. I love my boyfriend. I never really loved my online friend as anything more than a friend.

Nowadays, my online friend and I don't even talk anymore. But I'm glad he made the decision to not get into a relationship with me, because at the time I don't think I would have or even could have made that decision.

I dunno what the point of that was. I guess I just felt like sharing.