How the Apocalypse Can Make You Lose Your Job

[uc pseudonym]

Some time ago I was approached to write a serialized story for a student publication. I agreed, and promptly discovered the deadline was in 24 hours (the decision to include a serial came rather late). After debating with myself over what to do, I rejected all my serious and thought-provoking ideas, and went for something completely weird.

-

Segment 1: The Dangers of Working Late

The grease didn’t start talking until an hour before the end of his shift. Bartholomew was not, as a rule, a man prone to speaking to food byproducts, so his reaction was only to be expected.

His first response, quite a usual one, was to quickly glance around himself to see if anyone was throwing their voice. The restaurant was empty, as was typical just before midnight. In fact, the only person in sight was the grungy man who had ordered a burger a bit earlier and promptly fallen asleep.

One lousy burger and he had to put grease on the pan again. And now he was losing it, because he could have sworn he had heard it say something.

“Hey buddy!â€

[Sennin]

This story looks like it will be decent. The uniqueness of the opening draws me in.

[Maledicte]

"You've unleashed a Pun."

XD

I really hope this goes over well for the publication. Great title, by the way.

[Cap'n Nick]

I was just going to read this and enjoy it, but then I remembered the complaints about the lack of comments in the writing section. So, I shall also *share* the fact that I enjoyed it! My work here is done.

[ShiroiHikari]

Heh, quite amusing. :] I'd like to see more.

[Ratrace]

Are you going to post the rest of this here? It's good.

[Kaori]

I have the nagging feeling that treating supernatural events and the end of the world in a flippant manner is squarely in the tradition of someone, although I am not sure what author the story reminds me of.

My only real comment is that I, too, was amused by the Pun.

[Bobtheduck]

Haha... That was funny, but I didn't pick up on the pun... *sigh* I feel so slow... Anyhow, that was good. I hope to see more.

[purplemoose]

he he he i havnt been here in a while but glad i came back ^.^ ist funy story

[bigsleepj]

Ah, thanks! That was great!!! It certainly does take some odd turns.

[uc pseudonym]

I really hope this goes over well for the publication.

I've gotten very few comments about it, so it was encouraging to see this rather extensive response. Thank you, everyone.

Great title, by the way.

Thank you. It's probably my favorite part yet, actually.

I was just going to read this and enjoy it, but then I remembered the complaints about the lack of comments in the writing section. So, I shall also *share* the fact that I enjoyed it! My work here is done.

It is definitely appreciated.

Are you going to post the rest of this here?

Yes, whenever the next issue comes out. The deadline was the 13th, and I met it easily, but I don't know when it will actually be distributed.

I have the nagging feeling that treating supernatural events and the end of the world in a flippant manner is squarely in the tradition of someone, although I am not sure what author the story reminds me of.

I would find it very easy to believe that this has been done before, though for my part I can tell you I do not think I had any specific influences in writing this (save for perhaps some of Terry Pratchett's semantic mannerisms).

It certainly does take some odd turns.

An apt description of this story as a whole.

[meboeck]

Wow. This is quite an intriguing introduction. I love the title and the Pun.

[uc pseudonym]

Thank you. Partially for your reviews, and partially for reminding me about this. The second issue was published during a particularly hectic school week, and therefore I was unable to post it long enough that it slipped my mind. I will make a sincere effort to post the second part relatively soon.

[uc pseudonym]

Segment 2: Exposition, Schmexposition

“Joy. Pure, exhilarating joy. I have never wanted anything more than to meet a personification of grease and a malevolent inter-dimensional monster.â€

[Cap'n Nick]

Very nice. Looking forward to the next.

[meboeck]

[quote]“No, no, just a Half of reality is in danger,â€

[Maledicte]

[quote="uc pseudonym"]"Sure, I’ll have indigestion for a week, but it’s a small price to pay for life’s little pleasures, such as not dying.â€

[uc pseudonym]

Thank you once again. I have interesting things planned for this story.

[bigsleepj]

Thank you once again. I have interesting things planned for this story.

And we're all waiting anxiously for it to come! So far this story shows such promise! But you said its being published for a student publication. Is the publication getting any response concerning it? Just asking.

[uc pseudonym]

Fortunately for you, the combination of a late release of the second issue and the early release of the third, I can update already. Unfortunately, I won't be able to do this until at least tomorrow.

But you said its being published for a student publication. Is the publication getting any response concerning it? Just asking.

All I know is what people have told me. A few more people have given me comments since the second issue, and the third hasn't been out long enough to tell. Otherwise, I have no idea how it has been received.

[uc pseudonym]

Segment 3: Darn Them Clichés!

This was probably not what he was supposed to be doing. He could have been stopping the destruction of this Half of reality, but instead he was watching a twenty-something fast food worker try to pull his spatula out of a pan. By this point Bartholomew had set the pan on the floor and was tugging with both hands. Grease had to admit, it was fairly weird, and he had no room to talk.

“You’d think that you’d be more concerned about the collapse of your home dimension than a spatula,â€

[*Hope*]

Haha! UC, this is great! Weird, but great.

[Maledicte]

[quote] “Sorry about that. I get snappish during an apocalypse.â€

[uc pseudonym]

Very little of this isn't intentional. Different people appreciate different things, and I'm glad whenever any line strikes someone funny.

[Icarus]

Personally, I liked the rest of the line.

Oh, UC, in the fifth paragraph, you called Bartholomew Matthew.

[uc pseudonym]

No comment except: await the fourth segment.

[Swordguy]

for some reason i am remineded of a story one of my friends came up wiht with a writer that what ever he wrote started to happen...but none the less this is good

[meboeck]

Oh, UC, in the fifth paragraph, you called Bartholomew Matthew.

No comment except: await the fourth segment.

I had a feeling that was intentional since you did it twice.... I'm very interested to see what is going to come of that.

[Swordguy]

i think he jsut got lazy and didn't want ot write out Bartholomew all the time, and now he is playing it off all cool like, i have my eye on you UC

[Kanerou]

After the third segment, it still makes me want to beat my head against a wall. But it is very funny, and apparently the headache isn't daunting enough to make me stop reading.

Go English people! ^^