I need your help

Postby **livewire** » Thu Apr 21, 2005 5:37 pm

three years ago I underwent a terrible trauma at the hands of a girl I thought was my friend. That was the beginning of a spiral downward for me that ended in many more traumatic events and my eventual falling away from God and into darkness without me even realizing I was falling away. For two years I tried to deal with it all by myself and failed. If not for my family realizing that something was terribly wrong last year when I went to vistit them on a vacation from school and work I do not even think that I would have come as far as I have. They prayed and prayed for me, which goes to show how strong the power of prayer truly is.

Today, when I talked to my therapist, he told me that I still have a long way to go in dealing with what happened to me. He told me that I shouldn't blame myself... and that a lot of what happened really had nothing to do with me, but it is still hard to believe that.

Anyways....

I know that it is kind of hard to pray for someone without knowing what specifically is going on. I must, therefore, say that although my spirit is a lot better than it was, I still have a lot to deal with. I have learned that it is important not to lose sight of Christ in the midst of trials and tribulations and I know that mine are not over.

After what I endured, I had a hard time maintaining good, healthy, friendships. Although I have ended many of the unhealthy friendships I had harboured and now have many solid friendships with some GOOD and wonderful Christian people, I am still slowly learning that there remain people in my life who aren't really friends, but people looking to benefit from what THEY see as weakness...

So, here is the current situation:
I moved into an apartment this past January with one of the roommates that I had had before. It was supposed to be her and myself. Then, her boyfriend's dad kicked him and his brother out of the studio apartment that they had been living in together. He came to stay with us for a while. He didn't have a job at the time and still doesn't. The girl, I had helped her to get a job where I work a couple months before we moved. Now, her boyfriend was supposed to only stay there for a short time while he looked for a job and got a place of his own.
Now, it is nearing the end of April and he is still there and he is jobless.
Also, my roommate lost the job I helped her get by stealing a 40 dollar payment that a customer had found on the floor and handed to her.
Neither one of them treat me very well. They are rather condescending.
It is funny because I didn't see it at first.
A few of my friends had come over to see me and later asked me why I let them talk to me the way that they do. I was surprised. I was like, "How do they treat me?"
Then, as I have been regularly going to therapy, I have begun to notice little things.
I recently found out that I can get out of the lease if I get the girl to sign a release form. I don't think she will do it.
The funny thing is that I prayed about it around the same time that I was being considered for a promotion at work. I reminded God in my prayer that I didn't make enough money to move out of the situation and that if it was His will that I get out of it, please help me to find the way.
Since then, one of my Christian friends approached me and asked me if I wanted to stay with her and another friend who are getting an apartment in August. She knows I am moving to Washington in January and said that it would be cool. Also, I got the promotion. Starting this next pay period my check will be reflecting a $1.25 raise.
I really don't know what I should do. I don't know if I should wait until August to see if things go the way the should (The boyfriend getting a job and getting out of my house) and if they don't move in with my Christian friend until January, or if I should just kick them both out....
For one, as I have grown stronger in my faith, the two of them have gotten more and more weird around me. He isn't a Christian at all and she, although she used to be when I first met her, is no longer a practicing Christian at all. Neither one of them understands my drive towards faith at all.
I need your prayers. I need strength and courage and guidance....

ummmm....sorry this post was so long...

Postby **Rogie** » Thu Apr 21, 2005 6:15 pm

I'm sorry to hear about your past situation. I don't know the details, but it must have been rough. Also, I'll pray for you and for your roommate and her boyfriend. They clearly need salvation. I'll pray that God will continue to lead you and that things will continue to improve!

Postby **kazekami** » Thu Apr 21, 2005 6:17 pm

Imouto-chan we are still praying for you here. =). Have you talked to mom about all this?

Postby **Mr. SmartyPants** » Fri Apr 22, 2005 4:38 am

i will be praying livewire

Postby **livewire** » Tue Apr 26, 2005 3:09 pm

Thank you....

and, umm....I told mom a little bit...the moving part....

Postby **Mave** » Wed Apr 27, 2005 8:44 am

Wow what a difficult situation, God bless you for your kind and patient heart. I don't really know what to say except that I know God will settle things out for you somehow. I'll pray for that to happen a little quicker,K?

Postby **White Raven** » Thu Apr 28, 2005 5:37 am

I will pray for you! *Hugs*

Postby **livewire** » Thu Apr 28, 2005 10:57 am

Thank you....
I actually talked to my mom and she told me that I should move when I can...but, to try and not make waves in the meantime....
so...I am trying...
but, thank you all for your prayers...

Postby **sonichiro** » Thu Apr 28, 2005 6:37 pm

im deffiantley praying for you. its odd, actually, im going through something similiar now as well (even though your like ten years older then me, im not saying i know exactly what youve had to go through but im having a hard time as well). pray, and if God calls for it, fast. the word says "if I am for you who can be against you" so dont worry about the poeple your living with, know that God hears and sees everything and when your persecuted he is standing right next to you, holding you up and keeping you balance. read from the book of Gideon, he had allot of tough choices to make as well and asked God for Him to send signs. i would read some of that scripture and quote it back to God. surround yourself with solid christian people as often as you can, i find that when im with my non-christian friends im two-faced, its almost as if i live a double life and act differently with different people. but God can heal all things. wait on the Lord, quote scripture to him as often as you can, and pray throughout your day. God bless you in your decisions and your healing. from your brother in Christ, sonichiro.

Postby **Anna Mae** » Fri Apr 29, 2005 5:42 am

I will be praying that your situation will work out for God's glory.

Postby **livewire** » Tue May 03, 2005 2:20 pm

Sonichiro- Thank you so much...and, also, I hope that things for you work out for the glory of God as well....I will be praying for you!

Postby **anime4christ** » Tue May 03, 2005 9:32 pm

I'm not sure whether you want to get out of there or you want them to get out of there. A trick that works on non-Christian ppl like them is witnessing to them. They'll want you out of there life asap. I'll pray for you.

My Live Journal · Postby **Saint Kevin** » Wed May 04, 2005 10:23 am

I'm praying.

Postby **kazekami** » Mon May 23, 2005 10:37 am

An update on livewires situation. When they came back after being gone so long they got on my sisters case for eating food. Told her she should only have eaten rice. So she confronted them over him living there for free. And that he should pay a third of the rent. They got mad and told her she had to get her own food. And since she had no money then she had to call my mom to get something. But she went for 24 hours before calling us. Luckily her boyfriend bought her a little to eat before that. Then last week the guy threatened her. He told her that she should just die since no one liked her. Some christian friends moved her out. The landlady also released her from her lease. Plus her sponser from church found her a room to rent. It's really sad that the situation got to be the way it did. But now shes living with Christians. =) I think its sad her ex roommate and her boyfriend are so far from Christ. I pray that one day they will find him. I'm also very thankful that my little sister is out of that place. God provided a great place for her to move. Thank you for all your prayers. =)

Postby **Silvanis** » Mon May 23, 2005 3:37 pm

My prayers are with you.

Postby **Spiritsword** » Mon May 23, 2005 4:01 pm

Good to see God's will done. I will pray that it continues to be done and He is glorified.

Postby **livewire** » Thu May 26, 2005 1:30 pm

ah....I see my sister updated for me....
I just ask that everyone continue to pray for my ex-roommate and her boyfriend that they may someday find Christ.
I do not hate them nor do I detest or dislike them. I just think that it is incredibly sad that they are the way that they are.
They told me that I had no one...they were wrong.
Thank you again, everyone...

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