That Praise - Forget it. Pray for a job again.

[Haibane Shadsie]

I'm so annoyed and sad right now...

I went in for shift today on my new job and was informed that they were letting me go due to overhiring.

[admin snip]. No, I don't care that one of the mods is going to come along and edit my words. I'm ****.

The stupid place could have CALLED ME instead of waiting for me to drive in there, wasting precious gasoline and time.

I was told that it was because mine was the last application they took, not because I was a bad worker on that trail shift. However... being the self-blaming person that I am, I think I must have done something wrong.. made too many first-day mistakes or wasn't friendly enough or something. Maybe I was rude to the boss and coworkers without even realizing it? I know I have problems with that.

Why do I have to SUCK so much?

It's like.. I was trusting God for a job... praying for a job, having other people pray.. I get one, and.. whoop! It's snatched right away from me. God knows that I have trouble trusting him... this doesn't help. I know I have no right to be angry with God - still... I think I am a bit, if I'm really honest with myself. Maybe he'll do something to punish me... I'm not sure I care...

Maybe this is a way of saying that I really ought to just kill myself and get it over with. I don't want to. I really don't want to. I don't want to give up. I want to keep trying. I have a novel I'm polishing that I want to get published.. I have stupid dreams like that. I care about my family... but.. it seems like little things in life are just... pushing me closer and closer, ya know?

I think I'm going to go slash my skin and bleed a little bit.. maybe it will make me feel better.

[CobaltAngel]

Oh, Shadsie, please, please don't hurt yourself over this! God does not, I repeat, does not want you to hurt yourself no matter was the curcomestance. God LOVES you and he has a PLAN for you life. Life isn't easy, but its faith in Him thay keeps you afloat.
I will pray, and please rethink your self desturtion.

[Razgriz]

I'll pray as well.

[Stephen]

Prayin and talkin to ya on IM (I am so multitalented....:p)

[Straylight]

That sucks.. I will definately be praying for you..

[martinloyola]

well, don't ignore that other post on the praise thread, IT STILL GOES!!
may God finish the Good work he has begun in you!!!!!
can I ask you a question? good I knew you would!!
did God want you to have that job in the first place?
perhaps, and who knows I could be totally missing the mark,
but maybe He is trying to teach (not punish) you how to deal with
people by putting you in difficult situations, its like any subject
if you are never challenged, you will never grow out of your weaknesses
if a child never tries to crawl, (how thats gotta hurt the knees )
then how are they going to learn to walk
maybe what I'm trying to say is, grab hold of the good and get going
you want to be better with people, then God is going to put you in some
people situations you're not comfortable with, when people don't act in
the love that christ has called us to live out,
whatever the deal is, I pray for you and I know that God is a wonderful guider
and wont lead you astray, just ask yourself, where is He taking me now?

[Shinja]

im praying for ya too, im looking for a jorb myself and iknow how teribly frustrateing it can be

[ShiroiHikari]

-___- Suck. A year ago I was trying and trying to get a job, then I finally got one as a dishwasher, for like...minimum wage. Sucky, right? But I tried my best anyway, and they FIRED me after TWO DAYS. >O I don't get people...

Anyway, you'll be in my prayers.