-Lights-

[Felix]

I've got a sort of biggish update tonight, but most of it is dialogue. Sorry if it's overwhelming! I attempted to explain a little more about how the world works, and I described some of the species of "slugs" in Subterrum.

Oh yeah, and I figured out a decent place to end chapter three and start chapter four, so technically this is chapter 4 now. I can't go back and edit, though, so it might be confusing for a while. If they make it so that I can edit my older posts again, I'll go back and fix it.

And again (due to not being able to edit) there's something I must mention. Back in chapter 2 when Roseanne sees the lantern in Barne's guardhouse, I changed that so that she doesn't actually see the lantern, but she sees a chest with window in it and an orange light glowing from inside.

Just wanted to clear that up so you don't go "What the heck?" when you read the line about that.

And is that a plot twist at the end? Oh my!

Alright, here it is. Hope you like it!

P.S. Chapter Four is titled: Dinner.


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(Chapter Four, continued from above.)


While we waited for our food, Barne clasped his hands together on the wood counter and peered at me from beneath bushy eyebrows. “So, anything in particular you wanna know about?”

Even though Barne was fairly young, something about his mannerisms reminded me of an older man. I cocked my head to the side and looked back at him. “Yeah,” I said, “Can you please tell me about those slug things? What are they? Are they dangerous?”

Barne examined one of his finger nails, “Slugs? You’re talking about Gastro, right? Hmm… well there’s quite a lot of them, actually. Several different species. Let’s see…” He counted silently on his fingers. “Yeah, about 6 kinds. Gastro provide a lot of our resources here. There’s Gastro Auqus, colored blue, which is about 90% water. You guessed it; we get a lot of our water from them.”

I felt my appetite quickly retreating. “…you do?”

“Yep. There are some springs we get water from, too, but mainly from those. Kind of disgusting if you think about it, but then again, so is eating meat.”

He had a point.

“Then there’s Gastro Pyrus, which is red. Those are pretty rare. They’re not dangerous, but they’ll give you a nasty burn if you touch them.”

I subconsciously felt my finger tips where I had gotten burned.

“We mainly use those for lighting torches and candles, though there are other ways, too.”

“What about the black ones?” I asked.

“Oh, those,” Barne replied, “Gastro Noctus. Plural Nocti They’re harmless, and also totally useless. You see them most often hanging around in the back of dark caves or on the underside of Mossiri Trees. Some say they feed on darkness.”

“Oh.”

My question about the black ones, or Gastro… Nocti, must have thrown Barne off of his train of thought, because he had to think for a moment. “Okay, next is Gastro Aurus, which is easily the most important type of them all.”

“What does it do?” I asked.

“Why, it gives us our light!” Barne exclaimed, “See, the Auri have a special chemical in their skin that releases an amazingly powerful light when it is activated. Nobody knows how or why this happens, but it does, and regularly, too. This is how we distinguish day/night cycles and the passage of time. Every seven hours exactly, the Auri light up their skin, and any cave they’re in is dramatically flooded with light. This main cave always has thousands all over the walls and ceilings, but you can’t see them at night because their skin is normally clear.”

“Wow.” I said, amazed. “That must be something to see.”

“Oh you bet. Speaking of which, they should be lighting up before long, now. Hey, Madeline, when’s morning?”

Madeline appeared from the back, balancing a pair of platters on her left arm. “Twenty minutes or so, I reckon.” She replied as she set our food in front of us. She also set down two clay mugs full of water. I shuddered as I thought about where it came from.

My Pomelberry pancakes looked and smelled absolutely delicious. They were thick and fluffy, with berry juice dripping off the sides. Red and purple lumps in the cakes must have been the Pomelberries. A took a long appreciative sniff before digging in with no reserves.

If I only learned one thing at that bar, it was that Madeline sure knew how to make a good pancake.

Beside me, Barne was starting on his meal, which seemed to rival mine in deliciousness. He grabbed a sizeable butternut toffee biscuit and smothered it in honey before chomping into it.

“Amwheh.” Barne said through his full mouth. He swallowed hard and washed it down with a slurp of water from his mug. He cleared his throat, “Anyway, the Auri stay lit for exactly 11 hours, and then they just… stop, and everything is pitch dark again. So we have an 11 hour day and a 7 hour night. 18 hours, total. If you lose track of time and forget to get some torches lit before night falls, it can be pretty crazy for a little while. If you have your lantern with you, though, you can see by that.”

Barne looked down at my lantern where I had it wedged between my legs. “Speaking of which, you’re probably going to want to find a way to keep that safe and secure. There’s people our there with… well, less than honorable intentions, and sometimes it isn’t safe to be carrying your lantern around in plain sight.”

“Where’s yours?” I asked around my bite of pancake.

“Er…” Barne looked around, as if checking to see if unfriendly ears were present, “Well it’s not exactly a big secret, but mine’s locked up in the gatehouse. If someone wanted to badly enough, I suppose they could get in there and break it, but I don’t think I’ve got any enemies, so I’m not too worried about it.”

Ah, so that’s what that orange light was I had seen in the chest in the guardhouse.

We ate in silence for a while. I was about halfway through my pancakes, and already beginning to feel full. I chanced a swallow of water to help the food settle. As long as I didn’t think too much about it coming from slugs, it was the same as any other water.

I looked over at Barne who was polishing off the last of his biscuits. “What about the other two?”

“Hm?’ He replied after sucking a dab of honey from his finger, “Other two what?”

“Gastro,” I said, “You told me there were six types; you only listed four.”

Barne looked up at the ceiling, “By golly, you’re right. My fault. Let’s see… did I already mention Gastro Pyrus?”

I nodded.

“Oh, okay. Umm… well the fifth kind would be Gastro Lumnus, then. People often get this type confused with Aurus. Lumni’s skin is a silvery color, and it’s highly reflective, so when the Auri are lit up, their light reflects off the Lumni’s backs, and it’s hard to tell the difference between them. At night, though, the Lumni can be seen because they reflect the torchlight, too, but the Auri are invisible and don’t reflect any light.”

“Oh, I see.” I said. “What about the last type?”

Madeline had been washing dishes in the back, but she came out and lounged against the counter a few feet away, listening in.

“The last type…” Barne said quietly, “That would be Gastro Caustus. Colored pink. Terrible creatures, they are. They supposedly emit this toxic pink smoke that will destroy your lantern if it so much as touches it. It’s a dark day indeed if you run into one of those. Used to be they only lived way back in the unused caves where they couldn’t hurt anybody, but these days they’re starting to spread out. Coming out into the public caves and spreading their poison.”

“That must be the poison Moth mentioned today,” I said, “We saw some of that smoke when he was taking us to the city.”

“Yes, he told me about that.” Barne pushed his plate aside, “Ah, fantastic as usual Maddie. How much do I have the honor of paying you?”

Madeline smiled coyly, “Oh, you haven’t called me Maddie in so long. I was starting to think you had decided not to use pet names anymore.”

“Never.”

“Teehee, well the meal’s on the house, since it’s Miss Roseanne’s first proper Subterrum meal, and since you’re such a shameless charmer.”

Barne grinned, “Oh, but I can’t do that. You have a business to run, after all.”

Madeline squeezed one eye shut and thought a moment, “…You drive a hard bargain, Mr. Barne, but I can’t turn down an offer like that. How about half price?”

“You’ve got yourself a deal.” Barne replied, digging something out of his pocket. He pulled out a leather money bag and dumped several small clay chips out into his hand. The chips came in different sizes, and each size had a unique set of marks around the outside of it. This must have been Subterrum’s Currency.

Barne singled out a largish chip with little v’s on the edge, and 3 smaller chips with straight lines cut in them. He reached across the counter to hand them to Madeline, but she never received the money.

A loud crash blasted from outside and rattled the building. Through the doorway flaming bits of debris could be seen falling to the street.

“What was that?!” Barne yelled, dashing over to the door. He stuck his head outside, then withdrew it sharply, looking shocked.

“What? What is it?” Madeline asked fearfully.

“The whole city’s on fire.”

[Esoteric]

Hmmm it's getting interesting....

[Photosoph]

Madeline appeared from the back, balancing a pair of platters on her left arm. “Twenty minutes or so, I reckon.” She replied as she set our food in front of us. She also set down two clay mugs full of water. I shuddered as I thought about where it came from.

I'm only mentioning this because it's something I'm unsure about and struggle with myself. It's really fine as it is, but just to make it read a little more smoothly, you could change the line to ' "...I reckon," she replied...' . With the comma followed by a small letter for the 's' in 'she', it may make it less of a jump from the speech to the sentence itself.
Or something like that.

I really like what you've written -and thank you for the explanation at the start. Otherwise I might've wondered if I'd missed reading a chapter or something.

Continue with your writing, Felix! I'm really enjoying it, and am glad you've written such good chapters so far. ^^

[Felix]

[color="Black"]I'm only mentioning this because it's something I'm unsure about and struggle with myself. It's really fine as it is, but just to make it read a little more smoothly, you could change the line to ' "...I reckon," she replied...' . With the comma followed by a small letter for the 's' in 'she', it may make it less of a jump from the speech to the sentence itself.
Or something like that.

I really like what you've written -and thank you for the explanation at the start. Otherwise I might've wondered if I'd missed reading a chapter or something.

Continue with your writing, Felix! I'm really enjoying it, and am glad you've written such good chapters so far. ^^[/color]

Ah, yes. Thanks for pointing that out! You are indeed right, it should be a comma and a small 's'. I usually try and write it that way, but when you're writing sentence after sentence after sentence... sometimes it's hard to catch them all ^^;

Thanks very much! I will certain try to continue on with it! ^^/

[Photosoph]

Thanks; glad you'll continue, and glad to be able to help. ^^ I see you're putting Lights up on DA; that's great! Sorry I haven't commented on it; for some reason I mostly just comment on visual art pieces. ^^;

[Felix]

That's fine! ^^ And you've commented here anyway, which is really more than enough for me and I'm very grateful that you do ^_^

Anyway, I know it's been a while, but I finally have some more to put up. I've only written a small amount past where I was before, because I'm in a bit of a spot that's difficult for me to write... you know how those things go? And there's some stuff that I've already written that I'm not sure about, and I've been thinking about going back and changing some things, but I don't want to make too many changes because I want it to stay consistent.

And anyway, I can't edit my older posts on here, so if I do make any changes I have to explain them well.

I've also been writing scenes from further ahead in the story that I've already planned out, to try to get my creative juices flowing again, and that's worked out pretty well and helped me move on some with the present plot. Hopefully this will really turn out to be an epic story ^^;

Oh, speaking of changes, I think I'm going to be going back and changing it so that the lanterns are smaller, about palm-sized, which changes things just a little bit, and Roseanne tied it around her waist with a piece of string, just letting you know so you don't get to that part in this next passage and go "Huh?"

So anyway, here's the first part of chapter 5. Hope you like it!



Chapter Five~
.ashes.

Panicked screaming could now be heard from outside, and Barne had to raise his voice to be heard above the din. “Maddie, take Roseanne and…”

Madeline was staring blankly at the wall. She looked shocked.

“Madeline!” Barne barked.

She gave a start and met Barne’s gaze, a wild look in her eyes. “What?”

Barne’s voice had an air of authority to it, but he sounded nervous. “Do you know the way out through the escape tunnels?”

She gave a hesitant nod.

“Take Roseanne and get out of here. I have to get to the guard house to…” he gulped, “to make sure my lanterns okay. Then I’ll help get the fire control. Find somewhere safe and stay there! Ok?”

Madeline nodded again, fear behind her eyes. She took my arm with a trembling hand and led me behind the counter and into a back room. It was dusty in here; full of old crates and boxes. Madeline let go of me and hurriedly pushed some of the boxes aside, revealing a square wooden hatch set in the floor. There was a circular metal handle lying flat against it, which Madeline grasped and tugged on. A cloud of dust came up as she pulled the hatch open, revealing a stone-sided pit and a ladder which descended into the darkness. There was an old torch in a brazier on the wall, and a vial of oil and some flint stone on a little shelf beside it. Madeline frantically doused the torch with oil and bade me hold it while she struck sparks at it with the flint.

It finally caught. I offered the torch to Madeline but instead she ushered me ahead of her down the ladder. She followed right behind me, pulling the hatch shut over her head. Descending the ladder was rather difficult, since I had to hold the torch while also trying to keep my long shirt from tripping up my knees. I felt the reassuring weight of my lantern bouncing against my hip as I climbed down. The darkness grew deeper, crowding around me like a shroud and threatening to swallow the light from the torch.

Finally the ladder came to an end and deposited me in the middle of a long, low-ceilinged tunnel that traveled out of sight in either direction. My feet now on firm ground, I stepped away from the ladder and looked up to see how Madeline was faring. I was greeted instead by her knee-length pink underwear staring at me from underneath her dress.

Embarrassed, I turned away until she dropped lightly to the ground beside me. She still looked frightened, and she was breathing quickly and shallowly, but she seemed to have regained her composure

The air was stale and muggy down here, but the stone that made up the floor, walls, and ceiling was cold, almost like ice. I had to keep shifting from one foot to the other to keep them warm. I glanced at the shoes on Madeline’s feet and wished fervently that I had access to some kind of clothing. My long white shirt could only go so far.

From somewhere far above us could be heard the distant sound of crackling fire and yelling voices. It sounded like men, issuing commands to each other. I wondered vaguely how Barne and the Militia were getting along up there.

Wordlessly, Madeline took the torch from me and grasped my hand, leading me down the dark passage. I wasn’t sure how she knew which direction to go, but I trusted that she did. We moved quickly, and the sounds of the fire grew farther away, and then nonexistent. Once or twice I spotted a long black slug on the wall, squirming and wriggling to get out of the torchlight.