What's the best insult you've ever heard?

Talk about anything in here.

What's the best insult you've ever heard?

Postby rocklobster » Sun Dec 12, 2010 6:13 am

Sometimes, insults can be downright funny. What's the best one you've ever heard.
Here's one of mine:
"Why do you insist on talking? Every time you open your mouth, you show why you shouldn't."
"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you. I appointed you to be a prophet of all nations."
--Jeremiah 1:5
Image
Hit me up on social media!
https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100007205508246<--Facebook

I'm also on Amino as Radical Edward, and on Reddit as Rocklobster as well.


click here for my playlist!
my last fm profile!
User avatar
rocklobster
 
Posts: 8903
Joined: Mon Dec 20, 2004 1:27 pm
Location: Planet Claire

Postby Atria35 » Sun Dec 12, 2010 7:00 am

Unfortunately, all the best insults I know are rather stupid when taken out of context :lol:
User avatar
Atria35
 
Posts: 6295
Joined: Sat Mar 20, 2010 7:30 am

Postby Hiryu » Sun Dec 12, 2010 8:34 am

Sure, but insults are generally hateful.
User avatar
Hiryu
 
Posts: 457
Joined: Fri Sep 03, 2010 8:09 pm
Location: Pansey,AL

Postby goldenspines » Sun Dec 12, 2010 9:04 am

Insults are also generally not really that funny (expect to the insulter, I suppose).

Also, "best insult" could be considered an oxymoron. I honestly don't think I'd give the insulter the time of day by remembering and rating their insults towards me.



Although, there was one that I did smile about once.

"your innoying"
Image
User avatar
goldenspines
 
Posts: 4869
Joined: Thu Jan 18, 2007 8:42 am
Location: Up north somewhere.

Postby Sheenar » Sun Dec 12, 2010 9:27 am

In highschool, we celebrated William Shakespeare's birthday by writing Shakespearean insults to each other and posting them in the cafeteria.

Since none of it was to be taken seriously (and because of the wording), it wound up being hilarious and fun.

http://petelevin.com/shakespeare.htm
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

"Since the creation of the Internet, the Earth's rotation has been fueled, primarily, by the collective spinning of English teachers in their graves."
User avatar
Sheenar
 
Posts: 2989
Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2005 9:55 am
Location: Texas

Postby Rusty Claymore » Sun Dec 12, 2010 10:44 am

I love it when people try to insult someone and they take it as a compliment. n.n
Proverbs 31:32 "...when she watches anime, she keeps the room well lit and sits at a safe distance."
User avatar
Rusty Claymore
 
Posts: 1258
Joined: Sun Jan 03, 2010 2:18 pm
Location: Alaska

Postby Okami » Sun Dec 12, 2010 10:54 am

Rusty Claymore (post: 1443237) wrote:I love it when people try to insult someone and they take it as a compliment. n.n


"You're an overachiever!"

"Why thank you."

XD
~*~ Blessed to be Ryosuke's wife!
"We will be her church, the body of Christ coming alive to
meet her needs, to write love on her arms." ~ Jamie Tworkowski
User avatar
Okami
 
Posts: 1771
Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 10:00 am
Location: Michigan

Postby Nate » Sun Dec 12, 2010 11:42 am

My favorite insult is <censored by CAA>.

But another good one is <censored by CAA>.

And I'm also really fond of <oh you'd better believe this was censored by CAA>.
Image

Ezekiel 23:20
User avatar
Nate
 
Posts: 10725
Joined: Thu Sep 02, 2004 12:00 pm
Location: Oh right, like anyone actually cares.

Postby ShiroiHikari » Sun Dec 12, 2010 12:07 pm

"Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries!"
fightin' in the eighties
User avatar
ShiroiHikari
 
Posts: 7564
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Somewhere between 1983 and 1989

Postby Nightshade X » Sun Dec 12, 2010 12:22 pm

"Boil-dripping beef fart-sniffing bubble butt"
User avatar
Nightshade X
 
Posts: 681
Joined: Thu Nov 06, 2003 10:10 am
Location: The space between occupied worlds

Postby Okami » Sun Dec 12, 2010 12:24 pm

ShiroiHikari (post: 1443249) wrote:"Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries!"


We use this one a lot on campus. XD
~*~ Blessed to be Ryosuke's wife!
"We will be her church, the body of Christ coming alive to
meet her needs, to write love on her arms." ~ Jamie Tworkowski
User avatar
Okami
 
Posts: 1771
Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 10:00 am
Location: Michigan

Postby Mr. SmartyPants » Sun Dec 12, 2010 12:29 pm

"Four-letter-word" followed by "three-letter-word".
User avatar
Mr. SmartyPants
 
Posts: 12541
Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2004 9:00 am

Postby Doubleshadow » Sun Dec 12, 2010 1:20 pm

"The only thing you excel at is the number of 13th chromosomes you have!"
[color="Red"]As a man thinks in his heart, so is he. - Proverbs 23:7[/color]

The Sundries
Robin: "If we close our eyes, we can't see anything."
Batman: "A sound observation, Robin."
User avatar
Doubleshadow
 
Posts: 2102
Joined: Sat Nov 13, 2004 7:04 pm
Location: ... What's burning?

Postby ShiroiHikari » Sun Dec 12, 2010 1:32 pm

Nightshade X (post: 1443252) wrote:"Boil-dripping beef fart-sniffing bubble butt"


"You lewd, crude, rude bag of pre-chewed food dude!"
fightin' in the eighties
User avatar
ShiroiHikari
 
Posts: 7564
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Somewhere between 1983 and 1989

Postby Radical Dreamer » Sun Dec 12, 2010 1:39 pm

ShiroiHikari (post: 1443265) wrote:"You lewd, crude, rude bag of pre-chewed food dude!"


Oh my gosh yes I love that movie so much. XDD

Also. Most favorite ever.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=alXKHIgOYd4

"This is my chest box...that helps me to breathe."

"This is to help you to breathe, yes?"

"Yes."

"And which of these...which of these buttons calls your parents to pick you up?"
[color="DeepSkyBlue"]4 8 15 16 23[/color] 42
[color="PaleGreen"]Rushia: YOU ARE MY FAVORITE IGNORANT AMERICAN OF IRISH DECENT. I LOVE YOU AND YOUR POTATOES.[/color]
[color="Orange"]WELCOME TO MOES[/color]

Image

User avatar
Radical Dreamer
 
Posts: 7950
Joined: Sat May 28, 2005 9:00 am
Location: Some place where I can think up witty things to say under the "Location" category.

Postby ShiroiHikari » Sun Dec 12, 2010 1:42 pm

Oh yeah, I love that one. XD Triumph is so great.
fightin' in the eighties
User avatar
ShiroiHikari
 
Posts: 7564
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Somewhere between 1983 and 1989

Postby ChristianKitsune » Sun Dec 12, 2010 2:08 pm

From the song Duel Duet: (I've not seen the movie that this is related to, but I saw a fan vid with Jaffar Vs. Hades XD)

"You're a dead end dead beat nowhere mister
With a kiss like a Mississippi alligator's sister"
ImageImage
Stick Monkey Chronicles
Web-Manga Hosted by: The Project
User avatar
ChristianKitsune
 
Posts: 5420
Joined: Mon Mar 14, 2005 12:00 pm
Location: In my sketchbook of wonderment and puffy pink clouds! *\^o^/*

Postby Midori » Sun Dec 12, 2010 2:22 pm

*Midori's buddies are playing Serious Sam*
Midori: Why is every enemy in this game either headless or a skeleton?
Buddy: No you're headless or a skeleton!
I lol'd.
User avatar
Midori
 
Posts: 1805
Joined: Mon Sep 12, 2005 6:43 pm
Location: Mingling with local sentients

Postby Htom Sirveaux » Sun Dec 12, 2010 6:00 pm

"Your mom." That one's always been my favorite.
Image
If this post seems too utterly absurd or ridiculous to be taken seriously, don't. :)
User avatar
Htom Sirveaux
 
Posts: 2429
Joined: Fri Dec 26, 2003 6:00 pm
Location: Camp Hill, PA

Postby ShiroiHikari » Sun Dec 12, 2010 6:05 pm

Htom Sirveaux (post: 1443318) wrote:"Your mom." That one's always been my favorite.


I like that one too. I probably annoy the crap out of people all the time with that:

"I'm gonna go get a cheeseburger."
"Your mom is a cheeseburger."

...and so on.

I also like to retort with "Your FACE is _____." I am such a seven-year-old.
fightin' in the eighties
User avatar
ShiroiHikari
 
Posts: 7564
Joined: Wed May 28, 2003 12:00 pm
Location: Somewhere between 1983 and 1989

Postby Sheenar » Sun Dec 12, 2010 6:09 pm

ShiroiHikari (post: 1443320) wrote:I like that one too. I probably annoy the crap out of people all the time with that:

"I'm gonna go get a cheeseburger."
"Your mom is a cheeseburger."

...and so on.

I also like to retort with "Your FACE is _____." I am such a seven-year-old.


Glad to hear that I'm not the only one who uses both of these. My friends and I go back and forth with "your mom" and "your face" all the time. XD
"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

"Since the creation of the Internet, the Earth's rotation has been fueled, primarily, by the collective spinning of English teachers in their graves."
User avatar
Sheenar
 
Posts: 2989
Joined: Mon Aug 01, 2005 9:55 am
Location: Texas

Postby FllMtl Novelist » Sun Dec 12, 2010 8:21 pm

My personal favorite insult was from a book, actually. A character was referring to the female lead...

"And then there's this one. A girl so ugly, burn victims stare and point at her."

XD
Hats wrote:"Frodo! Cast off your [s]sins[/s] into the fire!"

EllaEdric 06:53 -IM SO UNEQUIPPED TO BE A MAN ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY.
User avatar
FllMtl Novelist
 
Posts: 1722
Joined: Wed May 26, 2010 6:31 pm
Location: Spa Maria

Postby Furen » Sun Dec 12, 2010 8:33 pm

There was that one where the person said "Your mother is so masculine... OH THAT'S YOUR DAD... oh you're mother is the one over there, she's nice."
And this I pray, that your love would abound still, more and more with real knowledge and all discernment. Be prepared to preach the gospel at a moment's notice. Do you know the gospel well enough to do so yourself? Be ready.
User avatar
Furen
 
Posts: 2695
Joined: Mon Jul 26, 2010 9:39 pm
Location: Mostly at my PC, but meh, I can be wherever.

Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun Dec 12, 2010 8:44 pm

Anything said by John Cleese or Dylan Moran.
User avatar
Warrior 4 Jesus
 
Posts: 4844
Joined: Tue Sep 07, 2004 10:52 pm
Location: The driest continent that isn't Antarctica.

Postby Rusty Claymore » Mon Dec 13, 2010 1:24 am

Recently taken to insulting via low-level terms (like ignoramus and low-life) with a dramtic voice inflection and getting away with it by follow-up quips on how they could do better. ▬_▬
Proverbs 31:32 "...when she watches anime, she keeps the room well lit and sits at a safe distance."
User avatar
Rusty Claymore
 
Posts: 1258
Joined: Sun Jan 03, 2010 2:18 pm
Location: Alaska

Postby ABlipinTime » Mon Dec 13, 2010 11:25 pm

Oh gosh. Why is this subject brought up?

But while we're on it...

I always laugh when someone tries to make fun of my voice - they try to make it sound like my voice is weird but they end up looking silly.

Reminds me of a trick I used to play on every copy cat (CC) I met:
Me: "Stop copying me."
CC: "Stop copying me."
Me: "I'm stupid."
CC: "I'm stupid."
...
CC: "Hey!!"
User avatar
ABlipinTime
 
Posts: 1006
Joined: Sun Aug 22, 2010 1:19 am

Postby Radical Dreamer » Mon Dec 13, 2010 11:36 pm

[color="DeepSkyBlue"]4 8 15 16 23[/color] 42
[color="PaleGreen"]Rushia: YOU ARE MY FAVORITE IGNORANT AMERICAN OF IRISH DECENT. I LOVE YOU AND YOUR POTATOES.[/color]
[color="Orange"]WELCOME TO MOES[/color]

Image

User avatar
Radical Dreamer
 
Posts: 7950
Joined: Sat May 28, 2005 9:00 am
Location: Some place where I can think up witty things to say under the "Location" category.

Postby QuirkyIceHeart » Tue Dec 14, 2010 3:19 am

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyCEqpMupIc

This entire conversation. Watch it. Now. X)
[I]“Love crosses all boundaries, and is often shot for trespassing.â€
User avatar
QuirkyIceHeart
 
Posts: 98
Joined: Sat Apr 10, 2010 11:49 am
Location: IN YOUR FACE. And the internet. And my personal dream worlds B) Arkansas for you boring people :P

Postby Ally-Ann » Tue Dec 14, 2010 5:51 am

A little girl was in Sunday school and asked her teacher a question.

"Mrs. Smith? Was Jonah really swallowed by a big fish, or a whale?" She asked.

The teacher replied, "A lot people say it was by a whale, and some say it was by a fish."

"Hmm. Then, when I get to heaven I'll ask Jonah."

"But Jonah went to Hell." The teacher said.

"Then I guess you'll have to ask him for me."
[color="Lime"]My Fictionpress account[/color]! http://www.fictionpress.com/u/740837/Ally-Ann

[color="Yellow"]My Fanfiction account[/color]! http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2401061/ArmyAngel316

My nicknames! [color="Pink"]~*[/color][color="palegreen"]Ally[/color][color="pink"]*~[/color] [color="white"](>[/color][color="Cyan"]Mochi-chan[/color][color="White"]<)[/color]

I like mochi. ^^

I question my [color="DarkOrchid"]sanity[/color]. (._.)

Operation: Blackout
User avatar
Ally-Ann
 
Posts: 618
Joined: Sun Nov 28, 2010 5:15 pm
Location: Gazing at some pretty foliage~! ✿◕ ‿ ◕✿

Postby TheSubtleDoctor » Tue Dec 14, 2010 8:12 am

ShiroiHikari (post: 1443320) wrote:I like that one too. I probably annoy the crap out of people all the time with that:

"I'm gonna go get a cheeseburger."
"Your mom is a cheeseburger."

...and so on.

I also like to retort with "Your FACE is _____." I am such a seven-year-old.
This is me.
User avatar
TheSubtleDoctor
 
Posts: 1838
Joined: Mon Dec 14, 2009 7:48 am
Location: Region 1

Next

Return to General

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 281 guests