I Need Help!!!

[Roxas2210]

What is the true meaning of love and romance? Dose anyone really know any more, or is everything having to do with attraction based on what the person looks like? Can humanity really be getting so shallow that they will do anything for someone who just looks good? Or will people start doing anything for the person they know on the inside of the shell. This has been grinding my gears for the past year. I have met people who will only go out with another if they are "Smoking Hot". Can this really be the destiny of the rest of the human race?

[LadyRushia]

I'm no expert, but I do know that society has placed too much importance on physical appearance, which is why what most people call love is shallow. I think that love the way God intends it is a relationship between two people who have almost everything in common; their friendship is so deep that it then reaches the next level of love. I suggest looking in the Bible and doing more research on this subject to find better answers.

[Slytherine]

In general, society has warped and trivialized the definition of love. Honestly though, you shouldn't focus on what society dictates, and just go off of what you feel. The true meaning of love and romance differs for each individual; people experience love in different ways. That's really all I can say.

~Slytherine

[Roxas2210]

Yes, but people need to know that there is so much more to love and romance than just what they look like on the outside. Not everyone can be the next suppermodel, ya know, but people still go by how people look, not who they are. That is what gets me.

>:-(

[Slytherine]

You can't help people who don't want to be helped. Do what you can for yourself, in order to make you happy. One the way you can try and help others. You can't just expect society to change overnight.

~Slytherine

[LadyRushia]

Forget what society says about "love" and do some research on what God says about it. His opinion is the most important anyway. Society tells me to have sex before marriage because most of them do. It tells me that sex is no big deal. I know that's false because I know what God says about it and that's what I think is the most important part.

[Roxas2210]

I know that God intends love and marrage to be forever, but I have tryed to make love last soooooo many times, that I am starting to question weather or not true love really exists or if its just a rumor. Society has a profound imact on not only me but every one I try to start a relationship with. I have no interest in sex in any way shape or form. So why must love STILL be so hard to keep alive?

[Roxas2210]

and one more thing, who knows what the other wants in a relationship unless they are told? If the girls I went out with would have just told me what they expected of me in the relationship, it probably wouldnt have gone into the ground! what is with that?!

[TalKeaton]

Urgh... relationships. I'm not one to speak highly right now, but I'll throw my two cents in anyway.

The definition of love has gotten way off track... to the point where indeed, not many people know what it should be anymore. Just doing 'whatever you feel like' or basing things off of physical attractiveness alone seems to eventually lead to trouble one way or another. Following God's definition of love is best, though while it sounds simple it's extraordinarily difficult and requires work on both ends of a relationship. Society's version of love is cheap and easy... which is why we fall into that so easily.

[Radical Dreamer]

I know that God intends love and marrage to be forever, but I have tryed to make love last soooooo many times, that I am starting to question weather or not true love really exists or if its just a rumor. Society has a profound imact on not only me but every one I try to start a relationship with. I have no interest in sex in any way shape or form. So why must love STILL be so hard to keep alive?

I think you may be trying a little too hard to find romantic love. I don't know your age, but if you're still in high school, I would heavily suggest waiting until after high school to even begin worrying about love, significant others, dates, anything. There are more important things to focus on at that age, like building good friendships and building a good relationship with God.

If you're not in high school anymore and are older, then my suggestion is to wait on God's timing. These kinds of things take time, you can't just say you've found "true love" overnight, and possibly not even over months or years. Try focusing on things other than romantic love right now, and I think you'll find yourself a little less stressed.

[Roxas2210]

Your words are comforting, but I am slipping farther and farther into deppresion. This is not just because I am single, but because I am quite literaly going no where with my life right now. I am a few months away from collage, but cannot seem to find joy even in that. There have been times when I have questioned and tested weather or not men would be any differant, but was dead wrong and I am now struggling with that too. What then can I do to get me out of this stage in life?


Troubled and sad,

Roxas

[Roxas2210]

I also need prayer. I have been struggling with something that isnt natural for guys. if you could keep me in your prayers, i would greatly appritiate it.

Yours
Roxas

[Tsukuyomi]

Love can be so simple, but at the same time, so difficult ^^ You really should concentrate of developing a solid friendship first. Get to really know that person and don't rush into a relationship If a relationship does blooms out of it. Then, that's great, but if it doesn't then don't be discouraged. Those that do fail are due to probably not really knowing the other person or vi-versa.

Since you're headed into college life. You should concentrate on that first Take things one at a time Don't tackle everything at once ^^ College sounds like the biggest step for you right now ^^ Just focus on that and I'm sure your stress level will be reduced What are you going to major in?

Of course I will, Roxas \o.o/ I'll pray that everything works out for you

[goldenspines]

I have little experience in romance, so I wouldn't know exactly how to give it a proper definition.

As for love, though, God has given us a pretty clear definition.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. -1 Corinthians 13:4-7(NIV)

[LadyRushia]

I see you're 16, therefore you must still be in high school. Honestly, you have your whole life ahead of you to find someone. Coming from someone who has cried herself to sleep some nights because she's never had a boyfriend, wait until college. After graduation, you won't see most of the people in your class ever again. Right now, build friendships with girls, especially Christian girls, and don't try to force relationships. I'd say that when you hit college, date only Christian girls just because they're more likely to understand your beliefs and convictions.

[HiddenWoodchuck]

16 and a few months from college? Dang

Honestly, this is something you should not be worried about. I'm sorry if this comes across as I know it all, but from personal experience... when I was in my mid teens, I was always upset over this sort of thing.... it's not worth it, man. The chances of finding "true love" at your age if very slim... I think we change our minds a lot over the last few years of our teens... and rushing to find someone, who is not meant for you... is no good. Take it easy... learn more about God and establish good friendships. I know it sucks to be "alone"(we are not really alone, but I know it feels that way when you dwell on not having a girlfriend...) but you will understand why it was good to wait and take time to grow, when you do find that special someone... chances are, it isn't gonna be when you want it(as in: right now), but you just have to keep that trust.

[ShiroiHikari]

In high school, people are shallow. Honestly, at this point, you should worry about college more than relationships, I think.

[Roxas2210]

I am glad that you all have such wise words for me.*sniff* But I will say again, I am a few months from collage. I was laying in bed the other night and thought, I am close to collage and being on my own, and all I have to account for it is a shattered heart and nearly crushed dreams. I have this intense disier to be with some one who can love me for who I am, and I can love them in turn. I do not want to live my days alone and hurting any longer. That is why I have been struggling with an attraction to guys, and I dont want that. But it is sooooo hard to quit something that can feel so good.

Yours,

Roxas

[mathgrant]

*huggles tight*

Love and romance are confusing things. As I know from having talked to you before, you are very confused about them. I agree with the above posts, though -- don't rush romance! Build friendships, and if one of them grows into romance, then that's great! And if not, then at least you might end up discovering you don't need romance after all, and that true friendship is all that is required. It's a win-win situation! =D

[LadyRushia]

I have this intense disier to be with some one who can love me for who I am, and I can love them in turn.

All the more reason to wait until college. I've heard that in college, more people get serious about finding someone with whom they are truly compatible as opposed to someone who's just good looking.

In high school, people are shallow.

This is true; don't let this dictate your thoughts on love. Don't let this make you give up entirely. You don't need to be in a relationship right this second. I know how much is sucks to not have anyone special and I had a really hard time with it a couple months ago when the waiting was just killing me inside.

Even when you do graduate and go off to college, don't make friends for the purpose of a relationship. Make friends for the purpose of making friends and if something develops later, then that's good, if not then it's still good because you have that person as a friend.

Believe me, high school doesn't write the rules on love and relationships. Don't think that it's the end of the world just because you haven't had a good relationship in high school.

[Roxas2210]

You all may be right, but it is sooo hard to live life without someone to share it with. I have spent night after night awake and crying into my pillow because the person I shared my heart, my whole heart (I only tell someone I love them unless my whole heart is screaming it) with, smashed and pulverized my heart right infront of my eyes. so I just want someone to share my life with.


Yours

Roxas

[goldenspines]

If you want "someone to share your life with", start with God. And, considering the fact that He loves you more than any human possibly could, I think putting Him before everything else in your life would be a good choice no matter how old you are.

[Radical Dreamer]

If you want "someone to share your life with", start with God. And, considering the fact that He loves you more than any human possibly could, I think putting Him before everything else in your life would be a good choice no matter how old you are.

Quoted for truth. The girl is wise. XD

[LadyRushia]

If you want "someone to share your life with", start with God. And, considering the fact that He loves you more than any human possibly could, I think putting Him before everything else in your life would be a good choice no matter how old you are.

A relationship consists of two people with God at the head. Seek Him first and then He will provide you with what you need.

[Azier the Swordsman]

Romance is way overrated.

[Roxas2210]

She is quit wise. and I try my hardest to walk with the Lord, but saitan is always trying to get me to fall off the path. Saitan is the one who started me liking men. HE is the one who has been playing tricks on my faith. HE is the one who prompts me to look at emo men making out with each other. I dont want to do that any more, but it is so hard to stop, even with God right there by my side.


Yours


Roxas

[LadyRushia]

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

That includes beating Satan and his temptations. Ask God to give you the strength to stop looking at those things.

[~darkelfgirl~]

What is the true meaning of love and romance? Dose anyone really know any more, or is everything having to do with attraction based on what the person looks like? Can humanity really be getting so shallow that they will do anything for someone who just looks good? Or will people start doing anything for the person they know on the inside of the shell. This has been grinding my gears for the past year. I have met people who will only go out with another if they are "Smoking Hot". Can this really be the destiny of the rest of the human race?

I used to feel like the world's turning so sometimes. But I've seen the opposite.

I agree with Rushia's statement. Don't think you have to do this all on your own. Keep praying and holding on to Christ.

[Roxas2210]

I have a request not only for prayr, but mathgrant put up a thread and wishes that people will look at it instead of just looking over it. its in the Testimonies and Spiritual Growth. Its one of the top three.

[Slytherine]

I'll go check it out and post!

Don't worry, be happy!

*runs off*
~Slytherine