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Being a man

PostPosted: Mon Jun 06, 2011 3:01 pm
by Dr.Faust
I've decided its time for me to become a man and start learning how to deal with my issues the way a man should. I want to get to a point in my life where I can deal with stress form life and the other things such as conspiracy theories and loneliness , esteem, and the such. I've always get this feeling that I will get on peoples nerves if I try to talk about my issues so I'm trying to learn how to deal with them by my self and with God. I'm looking for pray and advice for life and my addiction and how to live on my own. Thanks.;)

PostPosted: Mon Jun 06, 2011 3:11 pm
by Atria35
"Being a man" doesn't mean doing it on your own- being an adult means finding healthy and good ways of dealing with them. Normally, that doesn't mean doing it on your own- even the best of men fail. The most successful ways are through reaching out to others and therapy.

No man is an island.

PostPosted: Mon Jun 06, 2011 3:59 pm
by Dr.Faust
well i guess thats what i mean basically but i am looking for a way to deal with my problems with out the help of others, say if i diden't have anybody to help me my problems

PostPosted: Mon Jun 06, 2011 8:24 pm
by Davidizer13
Dr.Faust (post: 1483268) wrote:well i guess thats what i mean basically but i am looking for a way to deal with my problems with out the help of others, say if i diden't have anybody to help me my problems


But not every problem can be solved by yourself. Sometimes we have blind spots - we can't even see the troubles we're in without someone else around to point them out. Rather than trying to find a way to solve everything on your own, you should try to find people that will support you, so you won't have to be alone and left to fix your issues by yourself when they come up. I mean, when we're talking about stuff on IM, we've both been understanding things in ways we wouldn't have by ourselves. Like Atria said, no man is an island, and without other people, we can't have someone confirm when we're doing well, and we can't get called out when we mess up.

PostPosted: Mon Jun 06, 2011 8:42 pm
by Okami
Dr.Faust (post: 1483268) wrote:well i guess thats what i mean basically but i am looking for a way to deal with my problems with out the help of others, say if i diden't have anybody to help me my problems


There's really no good way to go about this. Life is done strongest when in community, having the help of others, and working together to achieve goals and accomplishments. Especially with addiction. If you want to live free, it's better to lean on others and tough it out than to go about it alone. Flying solo allows for secrets to breed - I learned this the hard way.

The best example I can give is through my own addiction and then through my call to celibacy. I couldn't do it alone. I would lose myself in the whirlwind of my battles - instead, I lean on friends that are willing to do what they can to support me, and a mentor to keep me strong in my commitments, a constant reminder to persevere. It's been a long ten months, and it's only the beginning, but because I have help, I am able to carry on.

I agree with Atria; no man is an island.

Shall be praying.

PostPosted: Tue Jun 07, 2011 2:51 am
by Dr.Faust
Well i guess i stress out so much because i don't really have anyone to talk to about my issues, i've tryed my sister but she's got the most uncaring attitude in the world, and david thanks for all of the convos i've learned that they really help me get whats off my chest which is a lot more often then not. and thanks for all of the prays and prays that will continue

PostPosted: Tue Jun 07, 2011 8:31 pm
by ABlipinTime
And now for the Sunday school answer: Jesus!

Not sure I fully understand what "no man is an island" means, other than maybe the fact that man is stuck in society (well, at least we are). It's perfectly fine to depend on other people, but sometimes people aren't there for you. I understand. Jesus is always there. Focus on loving Him, and that in itself ought to encourage you to strengthen your relationships with other people.

"Being a man" can either mean you're a male human being, something made in the image of God and that which God loves very much, or just a social construct something along the lines of "tough enough to do..." or "tough enough to take care of himself" (by "tough", I just mean "capable" or something along those lines). Think about what you're asking for. Usually when people ask in their heart to learn about such things... God throws life experiences at them. Be on the look out, then, for some soon-to-come trials that will help you grow. Patience doesn't come by just dreaming it up - patience isn't a skill, it's a practice. Thus, it only comes about through what? - PRACTICE! :D