My friend and a frustrating problem

Postby **agasfas** » Sat Oct 02, 2004 6:00 pm

To be honest i dont' know if this is a prayer or help, probably both. It's a little long but here it is:

I have a friend that i've known since 4th grade, now we all goto college. Since he has left he meet a girl online. And he talks about how they are going out and how he "loves her." If it isn't weird enough he's 19yrs old and she just turned 13 yrs, and she also lives in California. See, everytime i try to talk about it he rolls his eyes as if it's true love. But she is 13, she doesn't know what love is and frankly i dont think he does. He states how she had bad things happen to her in her life (not saying) and i think that may be a reason that he's drawn to her, the fact he can give confort. Also i think maybe due to he's scared of girls his own age. He states the parents don't like him and i can see why, he's 7yrs older and an adult trying to date a 13yr old. I want to try and talk to him more w/o him getting upset but i dont know what to do. When i do talk to him i do it in a nice manner not to be overberring. But at the same i'm direct about it. I'm trying to talk to him b/c i don't want him to persue this any further, and i don't want him to get in trouble if you know what i mean. Though i don't have the greatest luck w/ women, and can't understand them, i still can't see how he can do this. Any advice? And could y'all prayer that he wakes up and get the help he needs. He's like a brother to me and i dont' know what to do. It's just not right. Please help. Thanks.

Postby **Zane** » Sun Oct 03, 2004 2:23 am

I'll pray for you for advice and him for common sense,

Is he a Christian?
From my pov, just continue loving him and doing what you've been doing. I think he'll wake up eventually. Because that is a pretty big age gap.IF he 'loves' her then he'll wait around till she's older anyway, and 7 years is a long time. Good Luck anyway mate

Postby **c.t.,girl** » Sun Oct 03, 2004 2:35 am

my best friend was in the girl's situation and she kept talking about him, and he lives in texas, cept she's like 3 yrs old than his internet girl. but still i tried everything she just ignored me. now she' lives in texas with her mom. i miss her and wonder if she's okay. i'll pray!

Postby **agasfas** » Sun Oct 03, 2004 12:53 pm

Is he a Christian?

Yeah he is, though he never really talks about God. He actually goes to Baylor. I'm going to try and still keep giving him advice, though i hope i don't get him too angry. B/c i know people who become badgerers are a bit annoying, i just want to help him. And i'll also prayer for your friend too C.T girl. Anyways, i really appreciate y'alls prayers.

Postby **Madeline** » Sun Oct 03, 2004 7:01 pm

I'll pray for you and your friend. That is a strange situation...you'd think the parents would do something about it...
May God open his eyes to this foolish mistake and give him faith that the right woman will come to him, one God wants in his life.

Postby **agasfas** » Sun Oct 03, 2004 10:15 pm

I thought it was weird that her parents don't put a stop to it, b/c they do know about him. They have even said they don't like him. It's all a strange matter. I just keep praying for him. I appreciate y'alls help.

Postby **Rogie** » Mon Oct 04, 2004 5:06 pm

Keep being his friend but never stray from your opinion. I'll pray!

Postby **Spiritsword** » Mon Oct 04, 2004 5:22 pm

I will pray.

Postby **Jaltus-bot** » Mon Oct 04, 2004 6:16 pm

I'll pray about that situation.

Postby **Mr. SmartyPants** » Tue Oct 05, 2004 6:38 pm

will do! i've seen stuf flike this, and i'll pray!

Postby **inuchan** » Tue Oct 05, 2004 7:01 pm

try not to worry about it too much he will come to see whats right and wrong and will learn and open his eyes. i will be praying for your friend agasfus

Postby **Fsiphskilm** » Wed Oct 06, 2004 1:06 am

Love ma

Postby **Jasdero** » Wed Oct 06, 2004 1:39 am

Heh, you're not alone. I know a lot of people who either are, or have experienced this. I'd have to agree with Volt, here. This girl just feels flattered right now. Once she falls for someone in her immediate area [school, neighborhood, etc.] she'll completely forget about the 19-year-old-boy-she-liked-on-the-Internet. As for your friend, he'll get over it soon enough. Meanwhile, chill out, and whenever he talks to you about this girl, act very bored and disinterested. Good luck!

Postby **Kura Ookami** » Wed Oct 06, 2004 5:13 am

I've seen this kind of situation happen before and it always ends in time. I hope that the right woman will come into his life. I will pray.

Postby **shadowblade** » Thu Oct 07, 2004 8:25 am

I'll definitely pray for him. This kind of thing happened to a few of my friends too. It just takes a bit of time, and he'll come to his senses. Just stick by him. I hope everything works out.

Postby **agasfas** » Thu Oct 07, 2004 6:39 pm

13 year olds don't hold relationships too long at all.

You have got a point.

Thanks a lot, i really appreciate all of your support and advice. I guess what everyone is saying about them two coming to their senses eventually are right. Hopefully it'll be sooner than later. But so goes life. Once again thanks a lot.

Postby **Heart of Sword** » Fri Oct 08, 2004 1:05 pm

Actually 13 year olds do sometimes hold out long relationships, I think that's all pretty much a misunderstanding that they don't. There are these two people at the church who knew each other since they were in their young teens...about 14, I think. They're getting married next summer. (so sweet!)

So it is possible that they'll continue to be boyfriend/girlfriend. I will pray for this situation.

Postby **Destroyer2000** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 11:13 pm

Teenage girls seem to have something for guys that are much older than them. Those around my area do, and it gives them an even more swelled sense of pride. He doesn't love the girl, and she doesn't love him. People her age that think they love someone, that's just stupid. I get annoyed so much when I see people with notebooks saying, "I love ___!". Your friend needs to mature some more because I seriously doubt he could understand true love. Sometimes I think humans are incapable of true love...

Heart of Sword, those situations do happen, but it's extremely rare.

Postby **agasfas** » Sat Oct 09, 2004 11:25 pm

Your friend needs to mature some more because I seriously doubt he could understand true love

I may have to agree with you on that one. I mean how can he love her if he has never met her in person? Plus i can't get over the age thing, i mean there is a difference between 18-24yr and a couple 13-19yr old. There a question of maturity both physical and psychologically. Whenever he returns to town i'll bring it up once more then after that it's in his hands. There comes a point where it's frivolous to continue to tell him to stop. It may deter him from doing the right thing just in spite. Meantime, I'm going to continue to pray for him.

My friend and a frustrating problem

My friend and a frustrating problem

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