Converting to paganism...

[Kat Walker]

Actually I'm not, but I do believe I'm in need of some prayer.

For most people, their crises of faith usually end in a struggle with atheism, agnosticism, or just merely giving into the ways of the world in one form or another. My particular problem is when the great burden of being a believer in an unwelcome world is too much to bear, I occasionally find myself contemplating paganism. It has always been a rather large temptation, as I consider myself highly spiritual and the glamourous mystery of calling one's self a "witch", "high priestess", "earth worshipper", "magick practioner", or "whatever pompous made-up title you want" is rather appealing. To not be associated with the stigma of Christianity, to no longer suffer taunts and ridicule, to no longer be driven to tears in public, to be politically correct and socially acceptable, to feel like you can join the so-called "enlightened" ones by forsaking your "evil", "patriarchal", "ignorant", "oppressive", "masochistic" and otherwise inferior "desert religion" with it's evil book and vengeful god....just look at what the Odinists, followers of the 'original religion' of my race (Nordic) have to say.

However, the one thing that always kept me from converting was knowing deep down inside I do not truly believe in it. I don't seriously believe in any other god(s/ess/whatever), not that it usually matters what you believe in most pagan circles anyhow. Witchcraft to me is nothing more than glamourized prayer to some inanimate karmic "energy force"... as a Christian I can always get on my knees and speak to God one-on-one as His child, no pretense needed. The respect and care for the Earth part is nice and all, but it's stupid to believe that you need to convert to a non-Christian religion to exhibit environmental awareness.

Nonetheless, I fear getting wrapped up in my weaker moments with something that will only bring me momentary comfort, only to come to the realization that I selfishly abandoned the loving God who has done marvelous works in my life in exchange for the approval of man. Pray that I don't have the sudden urge to walk down to the New Age bookstore, or get discouraged by the next site I see savagely attacking Christians. How ungrateful and weak am I, that I run and hide at the first sign of adversity! Only God gives us the strength to stand so tall and fight so hard...all the more reason to believe in Him, I think.

[CDLviking]

"Blessed are ye when they shall revile you, and persecute you, and speak all that is evil against you, untruly, for my sake:
Be glad and rejoice, for your reward is very great in heaven. For so they persecuted the prophets that were before you." Matthew 5:11-12

Suffer these slings with patience and you shall truly be blessed. I will pray for your strength.

[Mr. Rogers]

will pray for you. its not easy to face hard times, but they are all worth it in the end.

[termyt]

I have thought like you, Kat Walker. I have thought, "Wouldn't it be easier to stop being a CHristian?" I could do as I wish when I wish. No church to force me to get up on a Sunday morning. No charitable drains on my finances. No worries at work about the language I use or the "after work" activities I particiapte in. I could also do whatever I pleased on the internet. It would be easy, right? Easy to ignore the voice of the Living God. Easy to ignore His kindness, His love, His mercy. Easy to ignore my responsibilities, my duty to my Lord. Easy to be a fool and invest my time and talents in things with out any meaning what so ever. Easy to invoke His eternal, unyeilding wrath.

But I can't do that. I have knowledge and responsibilities I can not ignore. Can I ignore the One who spent so much of Himself on me? Can I spit in the face of the Man who died so that I can live? Can I turn my back on a God who extended His hand to me? No, I can not. I don't know how to and continue to live with myself.

Can you?

Nonetheless, I fear getting wrapped up in my weaker moments with something that will only bring me momentary comfort, only to come to the realization that I selfishly abandoned the loving God who has done marvelous works in my life in exchange for the approval of man.

Truer words have never been uttered by human lips.

I know, you asked for prayers and I gave you a sermon. I'm sorry. You have my prayers as well.

[bakura_fan]

I will definitly pray.

[John316]

I myself have had similar struggles with the temptation of logic. I will pray for you.

[Technomancer]

"Take all that shall be brought upon thee: and in thy sorrow endure, and in thy humiliation keep patience. For gold and silver are tried in the fire, but acceptable men in the furnace of humiliation. Believe God, and he will recover thee: and direct thy way, and trust in him. Keep his fear, and grow old therein." (Sirach 2:6)

[Golden_Griff]

It's not easy being a Christian in this world, and it wasn't promised that it would be either. I suggest spending more time with fellow Christians--surround yourself with others that share your faith. That's what helps me a lot. Always remember that you're never alone; no matter where you are there are other believers out there (and CAA is a fine example of that!). Keep your head up, because that's where your help comes from.


Romans 8: 35-37

"(35)Who shall seperate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? (36) As it is written:

'For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.'

(37) No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us."

Luke 21: 17-19

"(17)All men will hate you because of me. (18) But not a hair on your head will perish. (19) By standing firm you will gain life."

[mastersquirrel]

My friend Andrew says: "k...no matter how "appealing" it may sound, it's really not glamorous, most ppl actually disassociate themselves w/pagans. Usually pagans are viewed as evil and ppl dont want 2 b arnd them. it wont make u feel any better in fact it will make u feel wrse. The major thing for a lot of them is more of anger than helping ppl. Just blieve that god loves u and no matter how much grief ppl give u u will b fine. No one can take wat u believe away from u and u shudn't b afraid 2 stand up 2 any1 who has a problem with ur beliefs. "

[Swordguy]

Matthew 11

28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

We need to give our burdens up to God before we even start...He will give us the strength.

[Arbre]

Kat, I'll be praying for you too.

[Fsiphskilm]

just before i

[Rogie]

I wouldn't recommend what Volt said (to become an atheist for a month) for everyone (or maybe even anyone), but I will say that it seems as if you already have your answers. You understand that God is real and that the paganism is just a way out of the suffering that must come with being a Christian. I know that times get tough -- I'm going through a tough time right now that's testing me severely -- but God is there, and I think, Kat, that you already feel His presence. You're probably just like I can get sometimes: "Why can't I just be alone for once?"

But we've got to accept that we're never alone, and that it's a WONDERFUL thing! Kat, I'll pray for you.

[soul alive]

that is a very tough problem to struggle with, especially since paganism and 'New Age' stuff is everywhere today. i will definately pray for you.

[Jaltus-bot]

To tears in public. Goodness! *hug* What are those people doing to you? *hug*:hug:

It’s hard to be surrounded by constant social persecution. You said that unlike them, you can always get on your knees and pray. I would encourage you to do that. We have so much power through prayer.

Sometimes others aren't going to change the way we would like them too, but we can know that God will provide us with whatever we need to get through things like that. You know deep inside of you the truth of who God is. What the world mocks and scorns now is in fact truth. They may call Christians ignorant or masochistic, but we know the truth, that our reward is in heaven and will last for eternity. We know the source of true wisdom is God. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom and knowledge of the Holy One, understanding. They only know foolishness, and to they that are perishing, the pagans and all, the message of the cross is only foolishness to them.

Keep following what you know in your heart to be true and seek God with your heart and eyes set on Him. Surround yourself with fellow Christians if you can that through fellowship you might strengthen one another in your walk and against the devil. You may be in a position of persecution now, but it will get better later.

You are a daughter of the King and you have a great big God behind you. For every time you do what is right and Godly in spite of others, you have another crown of life to where in eternity. Continue pressing forward, letting God be your source of strength. You can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. With so much going on, He is sure to use you for some pretty extraordinary things as long as you’re focused on Him.

Do you have friends there who are Christians?

Kat, even though we don't chat a lot, you are often in my thoughts and prayers. I pray that God would strengthen you against what others are doing and that those around you who are doing this would have their hearts opened to the truth of who God is and what he has done for us.

[Heart of Sword]

It has always been a rather large temptation, as I consider myself highly spiritual and the glamourous mystery of calling one's self a "witch", "high priestess", "earth worshipper", "magick practioner", or "whatever pompous made-up title you want" is rather appealing.

Maybe so, but shouldn't "Forgiven," "Beloved child of God," "Loved one," "Loyal warrior of God," and "Adopted into the King's family" be even more appealing?

To not be associated with the stigma of Christianity, to no longer suffer taunts and ridicule, to no longer be driven to tears in public, to be politically correct and socially acceptable

The LORD says to take joy in being persecuted for His sake. Remember, he died and suffered for you; so being taunted should be a tiny price to pay. And it's not the "public" who's doing that, it's Satan through them. So whenever you're getting made fun of, just keep in mind that it's really Satan.

[Jaltus-bot]

Maybe so, but shouldn't "Forgiven," "Beloved child of God," "Loved one," "Loyal warrior of God," and "Adopted into the King's family" be even more appealing?

There is also the priesthood of belivers, which means that we are all priests and priestesses.

[Mave]

Paganism is worthless in God's eyes. It's like wading in a mudpuddle when there's great wide blue ocean to swim in. I'll pray that you'll never stray and for the Holy Spirit to give you strength, boldness and confidence now and forever.

Consider Hebrews 6: 4-10

Don't give up, Kat. We're rooting for you!

[Madeline]

It's awesome that you are willing to admit your temptation. Now, turn from it; by the power of God you are set free from sin.
Rid yourself of everything that doesn't glorify Him. I know it's not as easy as it sounds. I'm going through that right now. It comes with alot of ridicule, lack of support, and disapproval of people you love. But you have to do it.
Ask God to help you, because He can do all things. God is good, and He never fails.
Don't give up. Keep fighting Satan and temptation! Keep your oath, even when it hurts. You have a place and a reward in heaven.
My prayers are with you; we are all praying for you. May the peace of God rest upon you, and may you continue to possess the strength of the Holy Spirit working in your life daily.
God bless you. *hugs*
-Madeline

[Anna Mae]

Well, I don't know that I have much that is new to say after all the great advice people have given you already, but I will be praying for you!

[Kat Walker]

Thank you all, this truly has helped....

[true_noir_chloe]

Sorry I haven't posted here, Kat; but, you have been in my prayers since I first saw this thread. For some odd reason, CAA would kick me off whenever I was about to post on this thread. Let's hope this time it works. ^_________^;;; I know that God is always in control, so for some reason He didn't want me to post here, but only pray for you.

I will continue to pray for you. You can always pm me any time. And, I'm so glad everyone has helped you out so much. ^_______^